祥哥與可凡談手療 #17 - 如何可持續性支持長期病患的親友
今篇分享，如何 support the support person !
拍的原意是打算比一些叉電/自我照顧貼士一些出需要照顧家裏的長期病患者的朋友，但近日，香港也好像處於一個長期病患的狀態了 😳 。所以大家不妨都可能有用！
這篇 Ken Wilber 寫的，真的寫得好好。是專為是專講癌症家屬支持者面對的問題⋯⋯
// "What is more difficult for the support person, however, and more insidious, is the inner turmoil that starts to accumulate on the emotional and psychological levels. This turmoil has two sides, one private and one public. On the private side, you start to realize that, no matter how many problems you personally might have, they all pale in comparison to the loved one who has cancer or some other life-threatening disease. So for weeks and months you simply stop talking about your problems. You sit on them. You don't want to upset the loved one; you don't want to make it worse for them; and besides, in your own mind you keep saying "Well, at least I don't have cancer; my own problems can't be so bad."
After a few months or so of this (I'm sure it varies from person to person), it slowly starts to dawn on the support person: the fact that your problems pale in comparison to, say, cancer, doesn't make other problems go away. In fact, they get worse, because now they are two problems: the original problem plus the fact that you can't voice the original problem and thus find a solution for it. The problems magnify; you clamp the lid down harder; they push back with renewed strength..."
// " So, day in and day out, if you are a support person you feel rotten; the situation just doesn't change. Sooner or later you find out that almost everybody not actually faced with this problem on a day-to-day basis starts to find it boring or annoying if you keep talking about it. All but your most committed friends start subtly avoiding you, because cancer always hangs over the horizon as a dark cloud, ready to rain on any parade. You may be perceived as a kind of chronic whine, and people get tired of hearing the same old problem. Hence the observation, "Nobody is interested in chronic."
Full text: http://www.healingjourneys.org/wp-content/uploads/wilberfinal.pdf
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